Getting Your Spark Back in Your Relationship: A Comprehensive Guide

Friday, April 28th, 2023

Couple with smartphones in their bed. Mobile phone addiction. Bored distant couple ignoring each other lying in bed at night while using mobile phones.

Are you feeling like your relationship has lost its spark? Does it feel like you and your partner are not on the same page and the excitement and passion that once existed between you has disappeared? 

If so, you’re not alone. Many couples go through phases where their relationship feels stagnant and lackluster. The good news is that there are things you can do to reignite the flame and get your spark back. In this blog post, we’ll explore some tips and strategies for doing just that.


One of the most important things you can do to get your spark back is to communicate with your partner. Often, when relationships start to feel stale, it’s because communication has broken down. You may have stopped sharing your feelings, dreams, and desires with your partner, or you may have stopped listening to what they have to say.

To reignite your relationship, you need to start communicating again. Set aside time to talk to your partner about how you’re feeling and what you want out of the relationship. Be honest and open, and encourage your partner to do the same. Listen to what they have to say without judgment, and try to see things from their perspective.

Rediscover Each Other

When you’ve been in a relationship for a while, it’s easy to fall into a rut. You may find that you’re doing the same things over and over again, and that the excitement and novelty of being with your partner has worn off. To get your spark back, you need to rediscover each other.

Try new things together. Take up a new hobby or activity that you both enjoy. Travel to a new place, or explore a part of your city that you’ve never been to before. By doing new things together, you’ll create new memories and experiences that will help to bring you closer.

Schedule Date Nights

Another way to get your spark back is to schedule regular date nights. When you’ve been together for a while, it’s easy to fall into a routine and forget to prioritize your relationship. By setting aside time each week to spend together, you’ll be reminding yourselves of the importance of your relationship.

Make your date nights special. Dress up, go to a fancy restaurant, or plan a fun activity that you both enjoy. By making your date nights a priority, you’ll be putting effort into your relationship and showing your partner that you value them.

Be Affectionate

Affection is an important part of any relationship. When you’re feeling disconnected from your partner, it’s easy to stop being affectionate. However, by reintroducing affection into your relationship, you can start to rebuild the connection between you.

Start small. Hold hands, give each other hugs, or kiss each other goodbye in the morning. As you start to feel more comfortable, you can increase the level of affection. By being affectionate, you’ll be showing your partner that you care about them and that you want to be close to them.

Spice Things Up in the Bedroom

Sex is an important part of any relationship. If your sex life has become routine or predictable, it can contribute to a feeling of disconnection between you and your partner. To get your spark back, you need to spice things up in the bedroom.

Try new things. Experiment with different positions, toys, or lingerie. Talk to your partner about your fantasies and desires, and encourage them to do the same. By exploring your sexuality together, you’ll be creating a deeper connection and reigniting the passion between you.

Practice Gratitude

Finally, one of the most important things you can do to get your spark back is to practice gratitude. When you’re feeling disconnected from your partner, it can be easy to constantly focus on what’s going wrong in your relationship. However, taking a moment to reflect on the things you appreciate about your partner and your relationship can help shift your perspective and bring back positive feelings.

Make it a habit to express gratitude regularly to your partner, whether it’s through a heartfelt thank you, a small gesture of appreciation, or perhaps a little hug. Focus on their positive qualities and the things they do that make you happy.

In addition to expressing gratitude to your partner, take time to practice gratitude in your own life. Make a daily habit of reflecting on the things you’re grateful for, whether it’s your health, your job, or your loved ones. A positive attitude and a grateful heart can go a long way in rekindling the spark in your relationship.

Remember, it’s normal for relationships to experience ups and downs, and it’s important to put in effort to maintain a strong connection with your partner. By practicing gratitude and focusing on the positive aspects of your relationship, you can strengthen your bond and bring back the spark you once had.

Ultimately, getting your spark back in your relationship requires effort and commitment from both partners. By communicating openly, rediscovering each other, scheduling regular date nights, being affectionate, spicing things up in the bedroom, and practicing gratitude, you can reignite the flame and create a stronger, more fulfilling relationship with your partner.

If you want to learn more on how to do all of the above then check out our Make or Break Plan and get you relationship back on track.

Alternatively, if you want to focus on yourself first and perhaps feel that a lack of fulfilment in your own life is affecting your relationship then check out our This is Me Plan. This plan teaches you how to live your best life so you can be the best to others!

At the Relationship Place we aim to give great relationship advice to all those in need, so if you think this blog post can help someone you know please do share it with them. You can find the share buttons at the bottom of the page.